I can't imagine there is anyone intelligent enough to post here who doesn't understand that there's a difference between cognitively understanding something, and an irrational fear. The fact that I know I'm safe standing in the observation area of the tallest skyscraper doesn't mean I don't feel an irrational fear that keeps me from walking close to the window to look down at streets 2,000 feet below.
You see ... that's the thing. If I have an irrational fear of heights, I'd get help and deal with it. I can’t think of a single excuse for continuing to live with an irrational fear.
There is no reason to let life be limited by irrational fears. There are all the resources available to us heal from those experiences, behaviours and fears … and its self indulgent to allow those things to become excuses for not living a full life.
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You also seem to say that being sexually abused is no excuse for a sexless relationship? Are you saying that the effects of sexual abuse are just made up?
I know well and very personally that the effects of sexual abuse are not made up. I also know that just like being fat or being afraid of heights (or any other limiting belief about my life that I have control over) I have the power to change it … so that I’m not a victim of it.
I guess I am intolerant of the circular dialogue around all the reasons people’s lives aren’t right.
If it’s not right – change it or live with it. Those are the only 2 choices.
It’s not possible to change bad things that have happened to us. It’s not possible to do anything about the past.
It is possible to make a decision to make your life the best it can be regardless of the bad things that have happened …
I was insensitive in the way that I presented it in the last post … and for that I apologise.
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
