Scroll down and look for the stage of Acceptance, Stage ONE. That is where you'll see the description of what you're asking about.
I hate to say this, but I'm thinking this is still 'early days' for your husband, and not the time yet to worry about where your husband is right now. He is still a good way from Acceptance.
I think he's in OW Withdrawal; IF the OW is gone. One of last posts I read from you said that you thought OW was still lurking around the edges. If she's doing that, he's STILL in Replay.
OW has to be totally GONE, so that he goes into OW Withdrawal; taking the necessary time to get her out of his head and his heart. It's not easy to deal with; that's why you need to back away for now, and let him go to deal on his own.
LA, you will drive yourself crazy trying to figure him out, when you're unable to; let go, let God do the work in your husband for now.
I honestly don't think he's that far along as yet; he's not had enough time to get far. There seems to be more time involved here for him to come on through, if that is what he trying to do.
The "children" should NOT make their visit until he's come through OW Withdrawal, in the case of breaking away from OW and she has to be totally gone, (NO LURKING ALLOWED) through the stages of Depression, Withdrawal, and he has to go into Stage one of Acceptance BEFORE the children appear.
You are looking at some time here, LA. And it ALL depends on HIM..nothing you can do will hurry this up. I re-read your thread and it's not been quite two weeks, this round; and unless he's a really fast astronaut, there's NO way he could have come along that fast...but then, stranger things have happened, too.
On the other hand, although you may make yourself available to him if/when he wants to talk, do NOT neglect your own journey/learning/taking care of YOU.
He does NOT need your help to come forward; I promise..and you do need to detach and distance from his drama.
It does NOT matter where he is..he still has to come through on his own. And when he needs you, he will come find you. Don't worry so much, LA, it will work out, regardless of what happens.
Let him go; and worry about YOU. I know from experience that if you don't let go, you'll drive yourself nuts with worry.
And you don't need that.
Keep me posted.
Remember, as each person is different, every MLC/Transition is different..what works for one may not work for another. Most of the time it is trial and error for ALL involved.
