This is my core being and has worked real well for me for this.
You can't take from someone, when they are willing to give.
I never got attached to stuff and some stuff I got attached to and never used, I was too sentimental, I didn't want to open a present just keep it boxed up, why, because of the memory of the feeling of receiving that gift.
I'm giving my wife and kids the gift they need, SPACE and love and stability.
They're not taking it, I'M GIVING IT.
I feel good about that.
I also know I'm the right person for my little MLC'er, married or not, why, because I never take things personally for too long and I've always been able to blow off a resentment quickly.
I never held onto anger for very long, a kwik reaction, oh i feel better and move on.
Never held anything against anyone, even my abusive ex stepfather, I took him to dinner, bought him a beer and told him hey, it's ok, you taught me a life lesson, made me a better person, yes ur a jerk, but ur u. And I was over every punch dang near the moment u got done delivering it.
when wife did the same that chuck used to do, it opened pandoras box, for the wkend it bothered me, then all the sudden the hurt was gone.
I'll be allright. and eventually she'll open up and know she can talk to me.
I'm sure she thinks, she's not forgiven, yrs ago a family member pulled a gun on me, in my mind my brother became dead to me.
When all this started everyone my parents,my kids, her, thought I would cut her off just as quick.
My brother knew what he did was wrong, she doesn't it.
I firmly believe I found DR,DB this board for a reason.
Because at first she was just as dead to me as my brother.
This whole deal to date really has softened my heart.
