Happy belated birthday! I really admire your standing strong and moving forward with the NC. I'm actually trying to follow that advice now myself and it really IS hard. Hang in there!
Let us know what happens on Monday - or whether that was just a text to get you to respond.. hate those stupid games...
He sent this in a text?? That's ridiculous! I'm with Rhody5--I wonder if this was a jab to get a response from you. I think you did the right thing by not responding. Try to enjoy your weekend!
H texted yesterday "I have an appt w/ L on Monday to file" and then again "My C said we are destructive to each other". I didn't respond )-:
Unfortunately your H can take whatever he wants from IC, and it sounds like he wants justification to D. And there's some truth to the destructive comment...your interactions have been really negative. I think it would take a saint to make the interactions positive on your side so I don't mean this as a 2x4. But if I were in your shoes I'd consider getting some DB phone coaching. You are getting some good advice and coaching in your thread, but it seems like you're having trouble with developing a code of conduct and sticking to it (and I would too in your sitch!!!). Just wondering if a coach could help you with that?
hugs to you...
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
I posted this in my "how to expose the affair" in infidelaty forum, but haven't got much feedback, so I thought I would try it in here (-:
It's time to explain what has happened with his sister last week, because I think it might affect my H's decisions good or bad I don't know. His sister had to leave her H in the middle of the night; they have been married for about 10 years and have 2 kids. They live in a different state away from all of her family. It turns out that he has been beating her and has had multiple A. It's been a very abusive R. Now she and kids are living with her mom along with my H.
I'm pretty close with his sister, especially since we are both going through the same thing (mine not as bad as her's) and there is no way she can save her M. And she knows I want to save mine. I sat with her on Sun and told her everything that has happened, and she does believe her brother is having an A. Yesterday my H also mentioned to his mom and sister, that he is hoping to get his own place within the next couple of weeks. He has not brought this up in a long time. I'm thinking he can't handle seeing the pain his sister is in and it makes him feel even guiltier.
Together 16 years Married 12 years Me 36 H 34 D9 & S6 Separated 12/3/09 Confirmed A 1/25/10 Exposed A 1/26/10 H hired L, but not filed yet 1/27/10
He did go to the L, put only to have him start writing up the paperwork. He called and left me a message that said he didn't file YET, just in case we get back together. I didn't respond.
Together 16 years Married 12 years Me 36 H 34 D9 & S6 Separated 12/3/09 Confirmed A 1/25/10 Exposed A 1/26/10 H hired L, but not filed yet 1/27/10
He did go to the L, put only to have him start writing up the paperwork. He called and left me a message that said he didn't file YET, just in case we get back together. I didn't respond.
