I am sorry, I never answered your question about No Contact.

Your case is a bit different... I don't know quite what to do about that one...

I get the distinct impression the BEST thing to do for your H is get him some powerful masculine examples of adulthood that he can feed off of. I get the distinct impression he doesn't know how to be a man particularly because he hasnt' been exposed to any.

And by MEN, I mean adult human males who have embraced their responsabilities and have grown emotionally enough to understand the merit of family, and long term investment in general.

Your H sounds like he likes to PLAY, but when its time to do painful emotional work, he runs like a gazelle in the other direction.

And No, i don't count fencebuilding or heavy lifting of physical objects work... I mean work that requires emotional maturity.