told him the results of the MLC are usually the one that leaves ends up more lonely etc. He said he still feels in his "mind" that he is doing us both injustice to be in an unhealtly relationship and believes we need to live separately and see what happens.
That's too bad it came to that so quickly. From what I've understood of what I read, it is all about trying to re-examine your life and relationship to see where you (not he) went wrong. What led your love and deeper connections to dissipate over time? Once you've started seeing where you've gone off, go back on to the tracks that you want for yourself and your M.
If you are patient & strong, not begging or pursuing, he may take a look at you and the R he is leaving and realize he wants it.
I think, not know, that telling him how he's screwing up may not help. It is almost like saying that despite his thinking and processes, that you will never accept him or those thoughts. Saying you think there is a better way (which is good) isn't the same as saying that he's going to be lonely. Some men might see that as a challenge or blame you for a R where his friendships have been traded for a M.
One woman on these boards had her H leave, and now he's lonely and misses her, but he still needs some time to clear up his head. It is a risk she takes, but by being patient with him, trying to understand him and their M better, she has been making steady gains at having him see the beauty of their R again.
Thank God for the opportunities, prepare for the possibilities. Just work hard to keep your emotions from taking over.
Side note - when I thought my W didn't love me, I didn't want to work on my M. Keep the house doors open.
