THe BIG problem mb28, is that you expect him to NOT call when you tell him to... You need to ACTIVELY PROTECT yourself from him.. you can't just ASK him to stay away, he's NOT going to.
And YOU seem to be having a serious struggle keeping him away on your end too... so between the two of you, you are both enabling this dynamic to continue... it WILL continue for months that way... maybe even years.
You need to make a big change to keep him out.. my vote is to hire a sitter for the kids and tell him to ask HEr to call if there is an emergency... and filter out all his calls and email from taht point on..
