Bunny - I think you should initiate the D proceedings yourself. Why wait for him? I understand your stance that he should have to do some of the heavy lifting, but on the other hand, you deserve some support, and the only way to get that rolling is to get the D rolling. I also understand your hesitation that he will flip out but...everyone who is going through a D flips out over something. It is perfectly normal for him to flip out and try to fight you on it, everyone does. However, that shouldn't stop you from going forward and asking for all you deserve.
Also as far as the match situation, what you experienced is extremely common. The match community is full of men who are combing through the profiles looking for easy sex, and they actually find it there too, so they keep at it. Its a numbers game for them, so they hit up 50 - 100 women and they will get some easy sex at least once or twice out of that. Don't take it personally or feel it has anything to do with you. I have known women who had very "innocent" profiles and pictures who get the same creeps sending them messages saying the same types of stuff you got. However, if there is a way you can report this particular creep to match, do it. Match does keep track of complaints against users.
It sounds like you are doing really well, although I can sense you are lonely and sad...those feelings are normal too, so just be very kind to yourself. Unfortunately, until you are completely through the D process, you will have a hard time getting closure. That is why I suggest you initiate it and just get it over with. The sooner it is done, the sooner your new life can be its fullest and best.
