I don't recall what the ages of your boys are. My oldest was 19 and had just moved into his first apartment when my ex wigged out. My youngest was 14 and just starting his freshman year of high school.
Initially my overwhelming madness to save my marriage at all costs led me to agree to move into an apartment and let my now ex stay in the family home with my son. Fortunately I found out about some of her extracurricular activities while she was still staying with a friend, and changed my mind.
When I spoke to her about wondering if maybe it would be better for ME to stay in the home with our son, given her new lifestyle, she gave in easily.
She moved into an efficiency apartment that she lived in for about 6 months before deciding to move 500 miles and two states away to live with her soulmate.
I hate that my two boys have not had their mother in their lives physically for much of the past 4 years. She does keep in touch with them frequently by phone, and she sees them about 3 or 4 times a year, but that's it.
Meanwhile I have lived with my youngest, who is now a senior in high school. I have washed every load of clothes, cooked every meal, bought every load of groceries, and attended every school acitivity on my own for the past 4 years.
You know what?
I wouldn't trade a minute of it for anything in the world.
You may or may not know that I have remarried. In June of 2008 I married a wondeful, loving, caring woman who has three children of her own. Though we have been married over a year and a half, we have lived separately all this time, all because I promised my then 14 year old that his parents divorce would not cause him to lose his home or the opportunity to graduate from HIS high school with HIS friends.
It's been tough not being able to begin our married life together. We have sacrificed much, and we knew we would be going in to the wedding. But we both know that my first priority when my marriage fell apart was to doing everything in my power to make sure that my two boys emerged from this as whole and intact as possible. While you can never know for sure, I would like to think that I have accomplished that.
Will it be hard? Sure it will.
Will it be worth it? Absolutely and in every conceivable way.
Blessings,
BIll
Last edited by Bworl; 02/25/1011:07 PM.
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
