Hi Friends, Pearl -you are so kind, that is very sweet of you. In the past I really didn't care so much about my appearance, rarely wore makeup, didn't like shopping, etc...but this process has encouraged me to put a little more effort into that (and off to get a much needed haircut this afternoon!)
OK, so no more chicken little!! I think I started to make 'baak baak baak' noises to myself. I am trying to get out of fear mode more and more each day..ripping off that bandaid and jumping into the wild unknown (I mean, in some ways i'm already in the wild yonder, but there is this very false security blanket trailing behind me). Talked about this w IC last week..like what am I waiting for? I am moving and making decisions for myself, what is best for me, but the finality of it all is STILL-as a somewhat scary process- sinking in. But maybe there will also be some relief?
We talk about doing what is best for ourselves at this stage, regardless of H's potential actions/behaviors,etc. I agree that is the way to go. In my best interest would be to get this email out. But why do I feel like it's not the DB thing to do? Does what is best for you ever conflict w DB actions, or should they mostly be aligned?
I am giving myself a goal of tonite to get this out. I just chew, occasionally on what's best for hhh vs what's best for M/DB? (overthinking again, probably..) When there is a potential conflict which wins? [or maybe there is no conflict, b.c he is already gone]
hhh is getting out of chicken-mode, slowly but surely. Thanks to all for being patient with me. Charge on!! -hhh
