Positive Moments In Time

[MrBond]

The fact that you actually noticed that she was "unphased" by the pastor's speech and some of the other little details in your post shows how you are still "expecting" her to change.

But that's a moot point if you're thinking of filing now.

"I said I can find a better mom than her. He said well, currently they don't have a real mom. "

I think I mentioned wayyyy back about you needing to let go of resentment for your W or at least finding some way to take care of it. You can't say that you'll find a "better mom" than her because quite frankly she stood by your side when you were going through your issues. The way she treats you D's is fine. She may not be the best example in terms of showing them how a relationship should go, but she does her job of mother fine.

If you don't get rid of this resentment, it's going to start showing up in conversations with your Ds. Already you're talking about how bad of a mom she is to your dad. She's a bad W, not mom. There's a difference.

Look at how many "moms" on here (the WAS) actually just pack up and leave their families with no contact. Those are the bad ones. Your W is just starting a new life that doesn't include you right now and she's actively pursuing it. Just detach and let her go.

So again I ask if you are going to continue to "stand". You mentioned before that the reason so many M fail is because the partners give up too soon. It's your choice, but just realize that you are going to go back and forth for awhile. It's only natural.