Running out of time.

[Cie la vie]

CTH,

Over time, she starts to tell herself they weren't right for each other.

My W used these exact words "we aren't right for each other". She also said she needs to do a better job of picking her men. All this was back in Oct.

I forgot to mention that during our mediation my W commented that I started to do my own thing every Saturday after I realized there wasn't going to be a reconcillation. I found this comment to be interesting as that was never my thought process. It strongly suggests she had a problem with me GALing for extended periods on Saturday's.

I have always been very active in the outdoors since the day she met me. I have consistently taken a day or part of a day on the weekend to either go rock climbing, mt. biking, exploring in the Mtns and sometimes golfing.

After she dropped the bomb I suspended these activities and stayed around the house which was a 180 tactic. Keep in mind I did not discover this site until late Nov. The problem was she was avoiding me when I was home and she would also sneak around the house to text or call OM1. It made for a very uncomfortable environment and I wasn't about to take that BS. I also felt like suspending my outdoor activities and hanging around the house and her were both seen as ass kissing (not my style). I decided independently it was in both our best interest if I got out of the house to give her her space and provid me with a venue to reduce my stress. I would do my thing on Sat. and I would take the kids on Sunday so she could do her thing. Seemed like a win win for both of us.

Now it seems she viewed my actions as a screw you I'm doing what I want and I'm dumping the kids on you. So I may have inadvertantly reinforced a problem she had with me rather than giving her space as I had intended. Oh well.

I have a question. Why give in on the 401(k). It sounds like that's something a judge would nail her on in court. Was it a tactic to get something you thought more important.

Yes and No. I initially relented grudingly to accepting the post tax split without a trade off. However, this concession will hopefully soften my W up such that she will follow through on her verbal statement to me from a few months ago and has reiterate a couple of time since that she will not pursue CS and SS. Medaition session #5 will address these issues next week.

Should she change her tune on these issues I will change mine on the 401K.