Same here. That same revelation hit me a couple of months back. And not just on a physical level: her actions, values, priorities, her personality, loss of decency, etc.
I think that is the eye opener for many LBS's. We look at the person we once loved and trusted, and see a person we no longer respect or trust. We see a person who threw away all the values we thought they had. Most WAS's seem to become totally different people than the ones we were married to, or maybe we finally see what might have been there all along. I know that in my marriage, the things that really started to tear us apart were there for a long time, I just made excuses and avoided dealing with them. I look at what a self-centered, materialistic, controlling person my X is, and I can go back now and see that those traits were there, I just never addressed them.
"You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf." Jon Kabat-Zinn
