New thread AGAIN Shiny, how do you expect us to keep up!
here's a quote from Home improvements:
Quote: By Alaskangel: I love the fact that you two are working together on home improvements! My H started doing yard work and building planters out of driftwood for the driveway when he first started coming back around to wanting the marriage. It was a sort of "domestic" sign that he was giving me. He also bought a small freezer for our family room, so that we could store extra frozen food items. So, these are great signs as far as I am concerned that your H is really committing to working on things!
This is a big concern for me at the moment. H keeps saying he will do stuff around the house and then he just doesn't. I don't nag anymore, just ask once and leave it. If it really needs doing I end up doing it myself. 9/10 he doesn't seem to notice In the past he would have apologised for not doing something if I did it. So the acts of service are not really happening hmmm. I finally figured out that H's other big LL is words of affirmation. I think he likes to receive WoA and do AoS. So I have to work on saying nice stuff to him. I guess that's where being Queen of digs in the past must have really hurt.
Glad things are going well for you Shiny, how's the old nudge nudge wink wink sitch?
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
Good day Shiny, 12 posts on a new thread ... Shiny your running a close second to Pam!
I like the title.
Someone (I think it was Optimist, but not sure) towards the end of your last thread made mention that CJ seems to be cooking more? I, too, noticed that CJ seems to be spend less time with the on-line courses and more time doing things around the house.
I think there was some of that going on with my hubby and I too.
I think one thing that helped was that I stopped telling him what to do, stopped asking questions that could be taken as me snooping and just focused on being his friend and letting him open up to me as he felt comfortable.
After the wine buzz wore off last night (only two glasses Pam!!!) I tried to watch some T.V. while CJ worked away on his course.
Could barely keep my eyes open, head was pounding (from work stress) so just dozed lightly. Thought I'd take advantage and go to bed early, (11:30 )...but wound up tossing and turning (must have dozed some) until after 3 a.m....woke up in pain, took some meds and stayed in bed until noon.
For the first time in a LONG time, when I woke at 3 a.m., I THOUGHT I heard CJ on my computer..."he's talking to HER!!! " rushed through my head...I even crept out of bed quietly to check ...he was asleep, computer was off.
Then I had a lovely dream in which I'm examining a huge diagonal surgical scar from the removal of my kidney...guess that's been on my mind too.
CJ made breakfast...yes he IS doing more cooking, cleaned part of the house yesterday too, but the "home improvements" have stopped and the time spent on line has not declined. This is supposed to be his "week off" from school (new term) but he's still on there a lot.
Actually, it SEEMS (this could be a huge ASSumption) that his verve for the home improvements died off after he got my e-mail telling him how much it meant to me...his reply was less enthusiastic than I'd hoped.
After Breakfast I got some stuff worked out for my class's test reviews, decided to catch Dr. Phil...and wound up dozing on on the couch AGAIN for over 2 hours.
This is NOT right...Actually, I feel depressed today, on the verge of tears.
Fran, one of the issues IS the nudge nudge, wink wink.....NONE of that Since Sept 6th....
Of course feeling overwhelmed (work) and down (health/everything) doesn't help, but I was thinking about my thread title and wondering just WHERE we're on our way to.
My life right now seems to consist of WORK, sleeping, watching TV while CJ works and a nightly ILY....
Problem is, it's the same exact ILY (tone, perfunctory, timing, lack of enthusiasm) that I heard for our entire M, including the parts where he said he was miserable and throughout the A's.
So...is this the way it is to be? Basically Room mates?
You know Kitti, CJ made it clear that my controling ways killed his desire for me...but it's been over a YEAR...and I honestly don't see any change in that.
Sorry for being such a downer folks...maybe this glass of wine will help some.
In the past he would have apologised for not doing something if I did it. So the acts of service are not really happening hmmm. I finally figured out that H's other big LL is words of affirmation. I think he likes to receive WoA and do AoS. So I have to work on saying nice stuff to him. I guess that's where being Queen of digs in the past must have really hurt. 
)...but wound up tossing and turning (must have dozed some) until after 3 a.m....woke up in pain, took some meds and stayed in bed until noon.
...he was asleep, computer was off.