flowmom | shifting from devastated to rebuilding

[flowmom]

Does he really want half-time custody with the lifestyle he's wanting?

I don't know. But I do know that 50% custody = no child support payments. And I know from H's past business dealings that he hates having ongoing financial obligations to people (always tries to pay them out).

My H and I have different opinions on how to handle separation with S. I believe he is so little, he needs to be in his own home, his routine, his bed. I do not want him shuffling back and forth. H has gone along with this and stayed here half time. I'm always here whether H is here or not. I personally think this has made it much more secure on S.

I agree, and I'm especially worried for my D3...she might be pretty distressed. OTOH, I know that H doesn't want to hang around here. I don't know.

My IC says the most important thins is that at least one parent is consistently there for the child and that you listen to their feelings. Also, if they are feeling things they can't put their fingers on, you know what they are feeling and allow space for that. What else can we do?

Yeah. And H is a bit defensive when I tell him things that the children say and says things like "he seems fine to me!", etc. He doesn't understand that they show their feelings more to me than to him.