Funny how former spouse put-downs lead to inner positive outcomes.
First.. having all of y'all as a sounding board is incredible. And the sound advice permeates through my obstinance.. or shall I say .. denial!
Pathetic. Put it behind him.
Those two words went a humming in my mind.
For example.. I had to ask for the former spouse's signature on some papers for the mortgage modification program. At the same time I decided to hit city hall for the Quit Claim on the deed, the Courthouse a few towns away for a certified copy of the divorce decree and modification order.
I thought... I'll just ask former spouse if he'd like to me to pick up a copy of the modification (which he'd talked about when we had it done).
No, no, no. That's what a wife would do.
Maybe I'll text former spouse to see if he'd like me to pick up a copy for him.
Uhhh... no, no, no. You're still acting like a spouse, anticipating his needs.
Well.. I WOULD do it for a friend. Maybe I'll ask former spouse if he'd like a copy of the modification.
Geeezz... no, No, No... I don't care if you're a nice person, Kathleen... and that you would do it for a friend.. even a neighbor.
UhhhHHhHHhhHhHHhHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
UhhHHhhhHHhhhhHHHHHhhhhh (along with the sound of my 'but I'm a good nice person.. that's what I do' gears shirring)
OhhHHHhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
It's not about him, about friends, about exes, about spouses, neighbors, et al..
It's about ME being independent. Thinking for ME and what I need!
Sheesh.. so that's what's been so .. well not really pathetic.. but a concept that never entered my mind.
Take. Care. Of. My. Needs. before fiddle faddling about anyone else's.
Uhh, yes.. and no need to ever be concerned about former spouse again.
