Trying to move on

[ClingingToHope]

So tomorrow is D10's birthday. I have both girls tonight because it's my night of the week. Since tomorrow is parent teacher conferences, they are off school so they can sleep in.

W already has the day off so I guess I'm dropping them off after breakfast. I don't know for sure because we never actually communicated about it.

There are conferences with both girls' teachers then D10 has a performance at night. So I'll see W at least four times.

I'm not freaking out about it right now. I've been thinking a lot about what's happening to Trixi. She was done and all of a sudden the WAS isn't done.

I can't imagine that happening to me. W never admits she was wrong. Once she gets embarrassed or makes up her mind about something, it doesn't matter if it was the exact worse thing to do. She'll see it through to the end.

We've lost friends, quit churches, changed schools because something happened with W -- she blew up at an official or got embarrassed.

So even if she's sitting at home drinking wine and crying, she'll always put on a brave face for me.

Closure? If I'm ever going to get it it's going to be years down the road.

Instead I'm focusing on becoming "The Me I Want To Be."