I hope you are getting on OK and holding up. I realised I just replied to you on koliver's thread, thinking it was yours.
I know what you mean about waking up in the middle of the night and W not being there. It's absolutely harrowing and terrifying - my heart goes out to you son.
I'm ashamed to admit this but I will, my W came back to me for 9 days in April 2008 because she found out I had been dating - it really shook her up. We were in a hotel room and had both fallen asleep. When I woke up but was still half asleep I thought she wouldn't be there and started screaming her name. As soon as I realised what I was doing I pulled myself together. I also used to get an anxiety attack at work every lunchtime. No idea why but they just came like clockwork. For months.
Quart9, stay strong and hang in there mate. I know you're going through absolute hell, and I know the hell you're experiencing all too well.
best,
GH31
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)
