As you know your daughter, my bride- is having an affair. I know she is her own woman and is free to do what she wants. i know in her head the marriage is already dead. I also know that you will respect your daughter's wishes, no matter what.
Affairs are addictive and fantasy- there is nothing real about them, they are infatuations of excitement and attraction and newness. I can only imagine- as the last time I had that feeling was when I first starting courting W. You know as we all do that the newness begins to fade and the fatasy dissipates, as reality of life sets in and the "love chemicals" in your brain have less effect- I've read books on this.
That typically takes 3-6 months to happen-inevitably, she will get to where she is now w/ me- and she can eiother buckle down and go to therapy and fix problems, or find someone new.
Of course she's going to say she's happy, b/c she doesn't have those feelings for me b/c we've been together for 6 years.
I believe in marriage- I believe in working on something that can and needs to be fixed.
W now is taking days off of work, I am happy for that and made that suggestion years ago. She is also coming off of her meds...another suggestion I had made.
I know you do not want to get involved. As a husband it is my job to expose the affairs and protect our marriage, and protect my wife from people w/ no regard for marriages.
You may not respect what I've been doing in order to do this, and I know that this causes you stress b/c it's easier not to think about.
MIL- I will quote you from our wedding, where you were dressed beautifully in brown..."I have no doubt that (brides name) and Grooms name) will be happy together forever."
You are my mother-in law, you are my family too- you have been married and you know what it takes, you are a beautiful woman and you know what it feels like when someone new notices you and takes an interest...
I will not contact you again after this (I know you've heard that before ). W will divorce me so she will no longer feel guilt from the last 6 months. Or she can open her eyes and see what happened to us, and seek family and marital counselling w/ me and turn things around.
If she divorces me w/ another man in the picture- she will not be doing it while in a sober mindset- and that is unfair to all of us. You can have a beautiful family the way that was planned 2 years ago- w/ a son in law who is who he promised to be, but failed until now.
The changes W is making right now would have benefited our marriage, just like the one's I have made would also have benefited us.
I will respect W decision, but I will not support it, and until we are divorced, I will call her relationship what it is in the eyes of God, INFIDELITY.
But I will not hold grudges.
I love you very much, and I appologise if this brings you grief- but it is stressful for a reason, the affair is immoral and wrong. Any husband who loves his wife would do the same. You too can make a stand- and help me protect something that you once believed in-
). W will divorce me so she will no longer feel guilt from the last 6 months. Or she can open her eyes and see what happened to us, and seek family and marital counselling w/ me and turn things around.