I think you should drill it into her head that she better come to the negotiating table before you squander a small fortune that would be used to educate the kids.
They say "no confrontation" and don't do anything to anger them... I say to hell with that. Get in her face if you have to. You say she's a coward? Cool then confront her. What's she going to do? Run to her L again?
GIMA safeguard your finances. I can't remember, but I think you already did it, if you didn't then cut off all funding.
M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married 4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT