the word is out

[courageous wife]

Hi newmama! Well, I have replayed the convo with H in mind and realize that I should have maybe validated what he was saying instead of defending myself which would have been a 180 for me. I truly did not think it was wrong to ask how we were going to handle it with the kids so it totally took me off guard when he "attacked me" with that. Here, I had "thought" I had accepted that a D was inevitable and then he says what he said...threw me off! Anyway, I will not bring it up again.

Going back to NC unless something comes up with the kids. Work on getting detached! I do so well all week cause he's not here and we don't talk but I get all gooey when he is here! Going to read up on depression/mid life crisis! They say that a lot of times, they have had a traumatic experience in their childhood but I don't know what his would be. He lost both of his parents in their early 50's so think that might be part of it now that he is in his 50's!

I am calling the L today and asking her to not request that H/us take MC as I know that will just make him more mad but I still want her to wait until the very last minute to send back our reply. My L said people change their minds all the time but I am not going to get my hopes up.

I have also slacked off on galing so am going to get back to doing that.

I do still hope that we can work things out but it just might take a D before H figures things out and I have to prepare myself for that!