I am sitting here wondering if this will be me in a few years from now....my husband and I began this journey 3 yrs ago. He is finally going to child support court on Wed. what I would pay to be a fly on the wall....I am so sorry you are feeling so sad and it hurts as it did when the bomb dropped.Any words of advice??? I am doing much better but I still have hope and I still pray for his return.....may God bless you for fighting and standing till the end...good luck to you....