Thanks everyone... esp Cat for all the words of wisdom. I've been doing pretty well... not feeling as sorry for myself these days. It does take time - lots of it and then the pain starts to diminish. I actually have a friend who is just now seperated from her H. She is suffering tremendously right now as they have been seperated for 10 months. She is where I was 5 years ago. I have been talking to her a lot. And somehow talking to her and trying to console her and do what I can to listen to her story has seemed to help me. I want to just make all her hurt go away because I remember the feeling of utter desperation and aloneness when my H first left me. I hope she can save her marriage. I told her to come here and write and try and get some support. It's what we all need.
I do think I am looking for someone to fill the void left by my H. I seem to chose the same type of man... that's a whole other issue but really I think it's something I really need to think about and address.
I am in the process of selling my business and house and everything and moving to another city. Am scared but I feel like after all this time I have just been stuck in a rut - just watching the world go by and not taking any sort of action. I have become comfortably numb... And I have to shake it off - so I am forcing myself into a different situation. I am going to take a year off and just focus on me and my daughter. Then will try and decided - what I want to do work wise and eventually where I think I want to live. I guess I am lucky that at least I have options.
