Good luck negotiating the keeping space while back together issues. It sounds like you two have hit a spot of balance for awhile. It's refreshing to read some "no news is good news" postings.
ok so the cuddle and the beautiful comment was worth keeping your mouth shut about the laundry, right? See ODP at it best. He showed his appreciation in a much more romantic way. Keep it up dear!
Yep mines done a runner, Im really struggling to keep my worries under control today, thankfully H is out so its only me struggling on my own..
There are several very formal letters on the cabinet Im stuck between opening them and making myself miserable or not opening them and worrying about whats in them..
Just been doing some house chores, cant go and see madam as cant ride no one to go out with and cant use the school, and just for a cuddle is a waste of petrol(gas).. Will go see her tomorrow for a ride and back to work for a few days on Monday so my brain will be kept occupied. I cant do anymore I have a job and am doing some overtime in my holiday but just wish H not getting a job would stop making me feel so sick to the stomach.. I know I need to detach but losing the house will affect me too.
Just ignore me girls/boys I need to rant and put my feelings some where as I sure cant tell H how I feel atm. Would be like rubbing salt in his wound poor love.
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
You are doing the right thing by venting here. Better vent to us than H. I hope you're feeling a little better now that you've gotten some of that out. Oh, don't open those letters - what would that accomplish?
Me47 H46 S13 M16 Piecing since May/09
"Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it." Lou Holtz
Put off reading those letters until you feel stronger and have a plan for a place and way to vent afterwards. You need to keep chin up about job stuff or it will make him feel bad because he is trying and can't help it. I hope you don't lose your house, but as my H is squatting in ours and I've been somewhat pillar to post, I can tell you that you can get used to anything briefly. Not like it. But get used to it for awhile at least. Not to scare you. But sometimes the bottom is tolerable. And remember your H's dream for a new place without bad memories for you two? You could maybe consider your biggest fear a possible mixed blessing? A temporary downsize to take the wind out of the fear of it? I'm not sure, but I've tried to reframe my living situation as a temporary adventure. Maybe it's denial for now, but it helps me stay more positive. Good luck!
Rabbit, Time for a little bit of positive self talk. Look in the mirror and have a good talk with yourself. Remind yourself that you are an amazing, strong, and beautiful woman... no outside circumstances change that...not financial circumstances, not relationship circumstances...
Honey, be kind to yourself. Fear of losing a house is the scariest thing - perhaps scarier than losing a spouse! lol - at least you've been through that one, right? You definitely should vent here - and everywhere! But not at H. Things are too delicate right now with his recent return. You are completely valid in feeling anger towards him for leaving, spending money. But you cannot change what happened. What's done is done. Fighting will put a solid wedge between you. I know you feel he's getting away with quite a bit. I know. We all know. We all feel that way. Imagine I'm scraping by and wondering if I am going to lose the house I raise my son in, and H is buying an airplane? F***er! But I have no control. I can only take care of my life one step at a time. And vent to all of us. We listen and we care and we understand. This is the hard stuff. If you really feel you are going to lose it at H, remember your feelings are justified, but acting on them now will rock the boat. Take time away from him if you are feeling heated. Ignore him if you must. anything to not turn it into a fight between you two.
Thank you my very dear dear friends, yep Im scared silly but no way on earth am I gonna screw up what we have now. I do think H is appreciative of me keeping a lid on things, and I do think the frustration of him spending the money elsewhere has gone some what more of a worry about no roof over our head. Its rattling my embarrassment 180 if Im honest and is taking a will of iron to keep under wraps, gosh if anyone had told me I could be this strong a year ago I wouldnt have believed it.
Im off to work for three days tomorrow and H is off with his hobby and I have a very dear friend visiting for the day on Thursday, she needs a cuddle and a pick me up, so I am taking her to play with madam which she will love, her littlun is ten months old and money is too tight to play ponies and she is hankering after some GAL bless her so it will be good to aid another mum in her GAL'ing. And no doubt what goes around will come around lol!
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
