A cheated cheater 2

[newmama]

So, my advice, which I know goes against the hard line a lot of people on this site give, is to not say it unless you think you can support yourself and 3 kids.

I wanted to see what was in your letter....so I didn't know if you were going to ask for an ultimatum or not, or just explain what you know and what you want. But I totally agree with Lotus--do not say D or push it unless you want it!

It sounds like your H is not mean to you, he just has OW on the side and she is far away, and he has few opportunities to see her. You are sitting in his home with his 3 children. So you have the stronger position, but not his love.

This makes sense....luckily in your case, he is not living with OW. And without having R talk, you can just keep up your 180s.

But love has a habit of coming and going. Read DR again. I doubt you will find ultimatum giving in the book.

Thank you, Lotus, for reminding all of us that love comes and goes. But is there anything that undefeated can do to bring that love back to her H or is he pretty much the one who decides, kwim?