Last night SO came back form AA meeting. We agreed to scheduled times to talk and not all the time. She acknowledged that I have been doing much better with listening and not questioning. Now I'm not going to ask questions this weekend, and I know I could have meltdowns.
I was reading some of your early post pearlharbr, and others. Up at 5am. So many similarities. So much to think about. About 5 years ago I decided I wanted kids. I was single and decided I would parent on my own with help from family and friends.
Than I meet OW, I was on this path and slowly asked her to join me. She more romantic, asking me to marry her and such. Me never thought I would marry, but open to it possible in future. Maybe when legal. We have not done second parent adoption. In the eyes of the legal system I am the sole parent.
In fact, the last few months, just when the affair started I have felt ready to plan for long term. We started making long term plans for us as a family, combined bank accounts, power of health care and such. I ended up getting this stuff together to get done. She agreed but little action.
I have been clear since discovery of A that if we ended our relationship I would always support her relationship with the kids. But I'm not arranging 2nd parent adoption now. She is a amazing parent but no way am I sharing legal responsibility at this time. Confusing a bit, need to talk with a lawyer again.
I want to work on this R but so angry, confused, hurt, did I say angry.
