Reading "Not Just Friends" together, and having time each week to discuss. SO shared more last night than before, I did not ask many questions just listened more. She noticed and thanked me. Told me when it first started and OW contacted her on Face Book, the feelings for OW made her think she might not be "happy" with me. She told me she quickly realized that was not the case and that this relationship with me is what she wants.
I feel like an emotional 'mush' most the time. This affair feels like a deep rejection. Makes me think on past relationships and how I am most comfortable with illusions more than reality. Feeling beloved, the only one, on a pedestal, etc.
Wow, I don't feel very attractive right now. I always thought of myself as independent. Way to much in my head. Need to GAL, have a cold and did not run last 3 days. Kids turn 3 next week and I still have baby pounds. Family coming next week. My mom seems to know somethings up but does not ask. No one in my family will ask me directly.
Today going to the library with kids, playground, and home to do some cleaning. Al-Anon meeting this weekend, totally cried at the last one. Some part of me knows this is all going to be ok.
