My only expectation is eventually we can reconcile.
Not today or tomorrow, in the mean time, I'm making myself available to my kids, the school and everything else.
Jack you didn't give up on your wife, I'm not giving up on mine, that's all.
On the rock part, I have son when I am suppose to.
Wife and D well that's another story, but just documenting just in case, no use it in fighting it, just sitting back.
I'm stuck, because I'm stuck. I just can't get the happy thoughts or things she has said in the past good or bad out of my mind.For lack of a better term, I'm stuck "not moving on" just not ready to give up or I just haven't found anything to think about over and over, probably more accurate and I really don't feel very fun or good inside, I find small things and smile, that's what I mean by stuck.
So anyway.
she's dipped a little further away and that's fine, so have I, then i get a text from her, there isn't any reason to give the details it was kid related, a joke about me being safe she was out,so u know i got a shot in,SHE HAS BEEN VERY POSSESIVE, so ignored the safe part, did not on putting prescription on your counter,she came back with k. thanks.then i texted back have fun tonite be safe. and texted her that d needs to serve her detention or she is going to be suspended and if she needs me to pick up d, i will.
i'm done with the rescue stuff, it doesn't work, isn't going to work, reading Amy's posts and some of the others.
See I understand the process in what a mlc went or goes thru, I didn't understand until reading some of Amy's threads the other side and how they see things.
so if I want to help my wife, I really just need to get out of the way.
but i'm not angry at her, don't want a divorce, but i'm ok with her finding herself, again the wanting a divorce really is the thing bothering me terribly, never had an issue with her doing or being, that's why she's having the EA with the neighbor, because it wasn't until she was about to drop the bomb, that I went off, because before that, a little jealous of their relationship, but i sure as heck didn't want them to know it, so i ignored it.
And in company of others i ignore it, it's here or in a car by myself that i go off like a rocket about their deal.they did it not me.
