flowmom | shifting from devastated to rebuilding

[flowmom]

How are you CG?

Honestly, this all sounds like a very bad idea to me. IC is for YOU and I don't really understand why your H has to be brought in the mix at this time.

My C's idea. I think maybe he wants H to realize that he can't have his cake and eat it too...i.e. have a "trial" separation and leave the door open while "dating" and talking about D.

If he wants to file for a divorce then he will. If he doesn't right now he won't. Why do you *need* something defined (hint: you don't). If he is sharing duties w/the children and paying the bills as he is obligated to do, what more do you need RIGHT NOW?

You're right, I don't need anything. I am not in immediate financial crisis, and coparenting is going really well. I can connect with him on that level.

What you need is time and IMO the C could very much cut that time short. When you ask the WAS to define something before they want to or before they are ready you are NEVER going to like the answer you get. It is way too much pressure and it doesn't seem like your H has any desire to see a C for any reason.

I think you're right.

You made me smile with your comments about the FB stuff CG . But point taken Coach and Ruined.