Running out of time.

[Cie la vie]

DW,

She did, don't know if she still does. Doesn't matter now. Anger issues, drinking and not helping enough with the kids and around the house. All of them were legitimate issues but in and of themselves not worthy of divorce. But throw in a MLC and A and you have the makings of a disaster. Here I am.

I immediately set out to correct the issues she had with me. The old 180's as we like to say around here. I haven't had a drink in 4 months, I did more than my fair share of the house hold chores and child rearing and I have my anger under control. Trust me the anger part takes a herculean effort given the BS she has put me through. You know exactly where I am coming from on this.

I know the protocol is that we do all the DBing for us not for them but lets be honest we all arrived her with the same goal in mind and that is/was to save our marriages. The 180's have without question been a positive for me but I initially set out making the changes to show her that our marriage was worth another shot. She can't help but notice the dramatic changes in my behavior but it has had zero impact on her decision and she has never once acknowledged the changes.

It's a constant battle to keep my mind focused on me and the kids. I'm sure you go through the same machinations of feeling like you are getting over the hump emotionally only to have a wave of sadness and despair wash over you and knock you back down in the trough. It's going to take time maybe a lot of time before the waves cease to pound us down. We will get to a better place and be able look back at this time in our lives and be okay with it.

It will be interesting to see how this train wreck ultimately affects our W. Mine seems so content and certain she has made the right decision.