And I forgot something...so I was in the den and he was in the front room making his dr. appt. He was trying to be quiet and I heard him say "I found a lump in my testicle" So I pretended like I didn't hear him.
When he mentioned he made his appt I said "oh for your cold?" and he said "yes and I made one for a physical." I asked why and he said "well I haven't had one in 7-8 years."
So I felt VERY hurt that he didn't tell me about the lump! He watched me give birth to his son! He was there for me when I had a laparoscopy to remove an ovarian dermoid cyst ! OW probably knows!
But I did an internet search and saw there were tons of different causes for a lump...only 1% being cancer. I guess if it isn't death related then he doesn't need to say anything.
And maybe he wants to rule out STD from the ho-bag!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
And I am making white chili chicken next Sunday!!!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
Newmama - I'm sorry that was hurtful, but I got a laugh out of it... Just the visual, whispering making the appointment, having to say OUT LOUD what the issue is, etc... What man wants to talk about his balls being faulty, seriously? It's interesting that he chose your house to do this in... I'm sure he's just embarrassed. Remember, after we've given birth, it feels like EVERYONE has seen our innards (and outards - is that a word?). Guys get away without that "show". He's probably just terribly embarrassed.
Thanks for the recipe!!! I'll try it!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
MF, glad you didn't think it was a big deal that he didn't tell me.
About the recipe- I used chx breasts, dried herbs and pinot noir instead and it was still amazing!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
Thanks for sharing your DB session with us newmama. Like you say, a real combination of reassuring and scary.
Originally Posted By: newmama
4)when WH drops comments that elude to divorced life in the future (i.e. day care comment, taxes, etc.) then to note that it could be something triggered him to make those comments;like he is using them to establish distance between us
I think this is so true! When I look back I see that with my H.
Originally Posted By: newmama
5) He assured me that "acting happy" might give WH the impression that I am happy and be prepared for him to say "I'm glad you are getting on with your life; you seem happy so let's divorce."
But that was good because you don't want a spouse to come back to you out of obligation or guilt; like if he couldn't D me because he thought it would cause me too much pain.So he returns but is not in it 100%; is miserable.
I need to remind myself of this.
About the crickets...I have your thread in "Watched" but for some reason it doesn't appear on my watch list so I don't see when someone has posted to it . Feel free to let me know in my thread if you want feedback.
Take care and be strong.
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
Art of Seduction....checking it out from the library would be better than purchasing it. I need to post a quick summary sometime!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
Thanks newmama for looking over my thread! Had a recent developement last night that kinda threw me a little but doing ok! Yeah, I am glad I haven't done any flirting either yet! Had a session today and am going to concentrate on the kids and getting some family time for now!
Sounds like you are doing very well!!!
M48 H53 M16 T18 S16 D13 SS30 H drops bomb PA/8-30-09 H leaves 12-30-09 D filed by H 2-10 H asks to come home 4-11 Piecing
Seems as though you put all the DB coach's advice to work and I think you are making great progress. 
. Feel free to let me know in my thread if you want feedback.