twin
Just posted in your thread, but wanted to thank you for coming by, and wish that you're feeling better... - darn bug keeps going around and around !!!!

Ellie

YOu know what, I think you're right. Not that he will ever admit it, but I do think he might be depressed.
It's funny but usually when we're depressed you don't always recognize it. I remember 5 years ago, the doctor was telling me I sounded depressed and I was like... Me? why? I have no reasons to be depressed... and then he asked me to write down on a piece of paper all that had happened to me in the last 2 years... so I did and then he starts ticking off thing that according to him played a major factor in depression.. Gee I had the whole thing.. from the deaths of my birthmother and my adopted dad with less than a month in between, my own serious health problem, the possibility that my position at work would be terminated, family problems here with my inlaws, working more than 2 jobs,financial problems, rui's affair... you name it, it was on that list. But still I wasn't finding all of that enough reason to be depressed! Go figure
Now there has been enough stress on our lives.. and on rui's life for depression... plus he does have a tendency to have low self esteem which is depressing too - or a result of depression. But I don't think I'll be able to get him to even think about it, let alone go to the doctor to get some help... does that mean that my faults will be here forever LOL
Do you think vitamin B can help a bit? I can get him to take that. Vitamins are normal manly things to take... as opposed to anti- depressants
I guess instinctively I often try to put in perspective the fact that a lot of it is a result of his emotional state, but as you point out it's hard to do so when all the guns are pointing at us.. even when we're not doing anything.
OH well, one day at a time... and work with what we have - that's been my mantra for so long I shouldn't have problem following it, yet, sometimes I do.. I guess I'm just human LOL
Thanks

Pam
another big hug to you.
Thanks for being there:)

Hugsies to all, my pillow is starting to talk to me.... "it's time... - it says - you're very sleeeeeepy!" ( Where did my night owl facet go????? )
nightshade

"Each and every one of us is deserving of a kind word, a gentle thought and the gift of understanding. "