DQ, I've read all your responses. None of them have been "ignored", except in the sense that in some cases I did not write back an acknowledgement or discuss it further. You have been very generous with your time, and I cannot reasonably expect you to donate more of your time to my case!
You are not the first person to be frustrated by my many "tried that already" responses. But it's an outcome of long experience, including highly regarded professional couples counseling and sex therapy. Which, of course, puts any casual forum contributor in a difficult spot of trying to provide a "better" or "novel" approach that's going to work. I've even had some people take it as a personal insult that I've had a long experience of having tried everything they suggested. To them, it seem I was just making up every "tried that already" response.
I looked over many of your responses just now, and I don't see where you answer my most recent questions. But I would agree they aren't all that important to solving my problem.
If I don't reply to a point, it doesn't mean I ignored it. I don't want to get caught up in an intellectual argument, which won't solve any points, since this is really about matters of the heart, and the groin, and life circumstances and things which don't follow logic. My reading comprehension and logical skills are fine, having put me at the top of the academic and professional world. But that's also part of the problem. These are matters where argument and logical rebuttals don't solve a thing. Even people who barely managed to graduate from high school often have great sex lives.
But most importantly, thank you very much for your hours of responses. It's more than I could have asked for. My stupidity in these matters is due to my over-intellectualizing, among other things.
Also, some of these discussions and disagreements stem from fundamentally different values among people. And again, logical discussion can't fully resolve those.
