Anger isn't the same as passion. Set boundaries and use your energy to hold to them. Do 180s and use your fear of getting that angry to hold yourself to them.

If you had mad-dog woman looking at you, would you work with her or against her?

I just walked up to my very angry W and tried to have a conversation about a skipping club. She was sharp with her words, as though I had just insulted her. I asked her if something was wrong, even though I expected it was negative R thinking. Sure enough, she began. I redirected the conversation, empathized a bit, reminded her that our goal was to build a connection. She wanted to stay angry because she wants to never be hurt again so being angry with me sabotages any hope. So I let her be. But I didn't. I can be proud of that. I'm up here typing, feeling very raw, but I didn't let that out on her.

Remember, IF you want your relationship to work, YOU need to do the changes no matter how emotional.

PS - sorry to the women who might take offense, but at least my W is the meanest, nastiest, and most sensitive 2 days before and throughout her period. I made the connection in this year that every time she really gets into the 'I want out' talks, she is just beginning her period. PMS lives... (:

Last edited by Onthemountaintop; 02/17/10 12:13 AM. Reason: forgot sth.