1. No catfighting - do NOT indignify your marriage by engaging in a fight verbally OR physically with this woman.. she is BENEATH YOU and does NOT deserve your time or energy - the best way to strike back at her is to IGNORE HER
2. FOCUS on your son and your marriage - maturity is your weapon here - not verbal abuse, that's beneath you now
3. Dignity, you deserve to be treated like a devoted wife and mother... you need to demand that respect, he's not going to had it to you for free
4. NEVER YELL. Always focus and stay calm... use medication or whatver you need to do to maintain a serene but committed and determined state at all times
3. Make your position clear, follow through, and do NOT contradict yourself by sending mixed signals... Many spouses do a great job of starting out, then they go and make their husband a coffee cake or something and blow the darn plan sky high... you told him Nothing from you until SHE is GONE.. you must STICK to that
4. Write down your position for yourself, and share it verbally with your H. Do NOT share it with OW, she is a third party and this is none of her business.. post your position here first and we would be happy to review it
5. Do not let your impulses take over.. focus on protecting your home, your family, and your marriage from this interloper..
6. The OW is not a person, she's a marital predator and a threat, you do not tolerate threats to your marrige - you remove them.. and you husband should be on teh same game plan.. if he refuses to support you protecting this marriage he has taken a position against it and we will have to change strategy.
7. Until your husband as established termination of contact with OW and youa re CONFIDENT this is in place, you do not contact him at all... he doen't get you as long as she is available to him... no cake eating
8. No sex for you, no flirting with other men, you are a dedicated wife and mother until the OW is gone.
9. Marital therapy - find a family therapist with a strong background in infidelity... no hacks or psycho therapists - a real infidelity researching family therapist - take the time to find a good one - theyr'e worth the work. Your h will commit to this and be FULLY HONEST with BOTH of you.
