maynard Yes I need to stop with the questions, so hard to do. I find I want that reassurance, often just left feeling bad. I'm going to hold myself accountable and vent on this board. No more endless questions.
Gypsy & Pearharbor Funny, I have read both those books in the first few weeks. SO reading them too. I have found them helpful. I get stuck in my head and than want to process for her, not with her lol. “Is this why you did this?, etc.” “ I think you did this cause of this.”
GAL, I so need to do this. I feel like I have become Mom and only Mom. I need more and will start working on it.
I have started attending church again, attending al-anon, looking into BAN, went to a party, getting together with some friends.
SO stopped AA meetings after we meet. She said her life became busy and she stopped going. Not sure yet what the significance is that is stopped after we started. I am new to Al-anon and just starting to reach out to others. I feel like a lot of my attempting to manage and control has surfaced after the A.
Pearharbor I have thought a lot about exposure to the 4th party, OW’s SO. It is so 180 from what I ever thought I would do. I don’t know them, do know they recently adopted a young child. Ugh, at first I just wanted to threaten the OW with it. Stop contacting or else. I’m so glad I did not do that. Now feel like if I expose to 4th party, it should be about telling her, giving her information she should have. I have her email but really don’t know what to do.
Thanks for all your thoughts and your time. It really helps. Today I will not seek reassurance from SO.
