These monsters that are playing in your head, are just that....YOUR monsters.
It is up to you to decide if the images that you have created are worth having days like this for YOU.
I know how freakin hard this is, cause I ( and most of us ) have been there too.
Try to find something else to occupy your time today, and don't allow yourself to get dragged into the quagmire of it all. Just remember that you need to feel it.....just don't let what "might be", own how YOU react.
Part of what you can control is how you respond. If you have taken the time to understand fully what MLC does to a person, and to understand that MLC has a route that it must take , and part of that route includes the tearing apart of the family structure, albeit not sure exactly why....
Part of you has to be to understand the role of the LBS during that time. Not being a doormat, but doing so from a place of concern and understanding.
Is that a dealbreaker for you ? Is that the hill you are going to die on ?
If it is, then you will find support for that too. I am willing to bet though, that if you can fake it till you make it , and find a way to get through this day, your views may change tomorrow.
Anyone can make it through the good times my friend....
A true test of character is when you are up against it.
Is the decision you make today, going to be one that you CAN wake up to tomorrow ?
Rock bottom isn't only for our whacked out spouses ....it is a place of spiritual growth and learning....The Bible refers to this place as the Threshing floor....
Take this time for you....this is the time where you can control you and find that person who you want to be....
This will pass Eric....
Can you forgive ? Are you willing to give up a period of time in your life to reach that rocking chair, in a fantastic relationship with your current spouse ?
Is there a chance ? Maybe only a one in a million chance?
Or maybe, just maybe, you come through this day a better, more learned man in who Eric is.....
