Is there hope?

[jasper67]

OK- good news is W never came over lastnight- she called to let me know she had too much stuff to take care of before leaving.

She defended her actions of "dating" and said that OM1 is just mad b/c she doesn't talk to him anymore.

I restated the fact that I believe she is dating and that I should not have to take care of her dogs so that she's able to do so.

I kept the conversation brief and wished her luck for the show this week.

I think after reading what I've read, I will just be done w/ this situation all together. I will contemplate whether to file or not, and I will remain Dark until I make my decision.

I have put too much energy into this sitch and I know that's to be expected in the beginning, but it's now been 5 months. My GALing and 180's are beginning to open some doors for me. I no longer feel tied to W or that I am incapable of moving forward w/o her.

I will keep posting what I'm doing for myself- but I will no longer spin out down this rabbit hole. W is free to do what she wants, as am I- will see what happens.

Tonight I GAL by going to the gym and having dinner w/ a friend.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

That actually sounds like a pretty good plan, Maynard. You sound MUCH stronger, and at peace, than you did even a month or so ago.

Puppy

[jasper67]

dont let me fool you, I have my moments- The link Cutter posted on BPD really helped me understand why things are the way they are and how crazy it is for me to try to comprehend it.

I appreciate all you've done for me in my sitch and advice and 2x4s-

I'll keep posting like I said- but no more of the drama

[chatterbug]

All pieces of the puzzle. The hard work is about to start now Maynard. And this is where we really support each other.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

dont let me fool you, I have my moments- The link Cutter posted on BPD really helped me understand why things are the way they are and how crazy it is for me to try to comprehend it.

I appreciate all you've done for me in my sitch and advice and 2x4s-

You're very welcome. I had given up there for awhile, along with some others, but once I saw that you were willing to do the work necessary (I forget who it was that issues the challenge to you -- Cutterbug maybe? -- I'm a man of my word and said I'd be here to help and support you.

Puppy

[mrbt]

I explained to W that of course there is nothing good about the last 4 months. That she did not truly make any attempt to benefit from therapy or shared activities.

W said "I have no feelings left for you, your behavior has been very unattractive, you have invaded my privacy."

I assured her it would not have happened if there were not so many lies.

Maynard, I was just going back and reading other people's threads - and the above quote sounds familiar. Are we married to the same woman?

[chatterbug]

You will notice similar words in many stories. It is because there is not to many ways of justifying guilt. A common theme. You will also notice that many of the stories have a similar timeline and the plot is rather common as well.

Then one day you will realize that what is happening to you is not unique. Nor are you alone in your struggles.

You are only alone until you realize this and embrace the suck.

Then the world begins to open up to you. You will become a better person. That is the gift given to the betrayed spouse.

Your very close to rewriting your future in a way that is positive to you first. This will help all relationships that touch you.

[jasper67]

Funny- I think we just may be...lol-

for what it's worth, I'm sorry and I feel for you- but like they say, there's no telling where it will end

[jasper67]

I know that R2C gave me a good challenge and Cutter and you dittoed it- for me to look into other sitches and give some help-

That's been the greatest help for me- like Cutter said- we realize we are not unique

[jasper67]

OK- W has texted me that she did not leave town today b/c a horse fell in the trailer...says she'll tell me about it later.

I'm really wondering if I care to reply at all or even speak w/ her so long as OM2 is in the picture.

I feel so disrespected by her lack of morals, and intergrity that I really belive there is nothing to say to her at all.

I think she's just being nice- but it makes no sense...