Kalni, I'm so sorry, I missed your post about your mom. How scary! I wish you and your family good health.
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.
Mom woke up today (!!), Thank GOD, but her face now is swollen. Which is something the doc said was to be expected.
I lived a day in paranoia yesterday. I was so mad at her for walking out on us leaving me there standing with the docs, trying to figure out what to do. She didnt want to leave my dad alone and said "others" cant be deciding for her. Others meant me but I didnt make a decision, the docs did. Anyway, I hope she does have the MRI today so that we can be sure of what is going on.
H said he will read the 5 LL book. He was really nice yesterday. Just as a husband/life partner should be. Supportive, caring, handling the details. It felt good to finally to be able to lean on someone, even if it was for a while. I was touched that he waited for us at the hospital when we arrived with the ambulance. He left his job right in its peak hours.
I will post more about me, later. I have a busy day today at work, my son stayed home cause he is sick and I feel like maybe I am sick as well. K
Gosh K, I hope it is nothing serious with your Mum, perhaps something bought on by stress? Good luck with your Mum today.
I have to agree with the others, bf is MUCH improved on these AD's but he still struggles with having the drive to ML, its more a mental thing than a physical thing. Before this AD he could barely do it at all, his desire just wasnt there, but he said it defo wasnt me and he was very much attracted to me, but yes, the brain chemistry was not firing I guess!
Anyway, what a shame you had a busy day at work and couldnt call in sick or something after what happened with your Mum. I like the way you describe H being like a proper H, thats wonderful that after everything, you two are pulling together in times like this as a proper couple once again.
xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
I cannot imagine what you went through with your mom disappearing like that! Her overriding concern for your father became greater than her own well-being. I'm glad to hear you found her and that she might be in a better frame of mind today.
And remember.. you are part of her gene pool. The way she handles things was your role model in how to address issues.
I'm sending thoughts and prayers for your dad and family. Waiting is so difficult, as is worrying. And yet, you still have him, even with his illness. Being able to savor his presence is a beautiful thing in the midst of worry and chaos.
Your spouse was able to be your husband in the hospital. A source of support, someone you turned to, let your guard down and relied on. You were a priority over everything else. Actions.
Sorry to hear about your mom. Stress is horrible on the body as many on this site know. It is awesome that H was there for you. It is also good that you allowed him to be there for you and relied on him. It will continue to help him as he works back to you. It is great that you two could come together in a time of need.
Me29 S3 H left 4/1/09 I file 8/2/10 Divorce final 5/17/11 1st http://www.tinyurl.com/25lhu52 2nd http://www.tinyurl.com/2c35ueg 3rd http://www.tinyurl.com/322yk89
Thinking good thoughts for you mom and your dad today...how stubborn our parents can be! Guess that is why we are stubborn, too?
And how nice that your husband could be there for you when you needed him. Actions like that help you feel loved and I am sure they help him feel useful instead of a 'mistake'...
That was scary to hear about your Mom. I hope that she is allowing them to help her. I have heard numerous stories of people wanting to get to their spouse because they need them. She apparently feels his need is greater than hers.
Good for you for letting your H be there for you. The more he feels that he is "good" for you, the more loving he will feel. I would say stop the R talks for now unless you are with your C. Focus on the good of each day and don't rush.
thinking of you. kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
I am so sorry to hear of your mother's problems. In a way, it is very romantic in that she cares so much for her husband that it affects her own health.
Hopefully she can be convincee to get the MRI.
It is great that you have your H by your side through this.
And remember.. you are part of her gene pool. The way she handles things was your role model in how to address issues.
THAT is scary!!!! I was thinking about it the whole time we were driving around looking for her. I almost told H "shoot me if I behave like this to our kids when we are old"...
Thanks guys, she went to one doc today and will schedule the MRI. It should be done ASAP, but I cant make her do anything.
Kerry, it is very touching to see how they both feel so connected and depend on each other. They are married 45 years. They feel their time together is limited. THAT is the kind of committement, dedication and love people should aim for. K