You are doing great. I don't think you should talk about the no TV thing anymore, it's making you come across a little holier-than-thou I think. And she'll be feeling that. Carry on with the AOS because that is a commitment you've made to yourself. She most likely hasn't made a commitment to herself about getting physical with you. She is doing this at her pace, and you are doing it at yours. Don't be watching what she's doing all the time (I'm sure she feels like she's being watched).
The perfect childhood thing is something my H (the alcoholic) also claimed to have - which I didn't really buy. But there was no point ever trying to raise that with him. In fact maybe he did have a great childhood and maybe that was part of the problem. Complacency and never having learned that you have to work for things. He just expected a great M like his folks had was going to fall into his lap as his birthright. Whereas I knew that my folks had had their problems and I wanted to work at having a better M than that.
Also I believe he used my disclosures about my own upbringing as "proof" that I was the defective one. Whereas he had a perfect upbringing and was therefore fine.
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
