H4L (()) you are doing so well hun! I know how hard it is for you even more so that H is under your nose and still no signs of affection. He has built a good strong wall to hide you behind and at the moment a huge amount of resentment is acting like a concrete wall behind the bricks, bet hes even got a barbed wire roll on top incase of emergencies..
I tried to look at the wall in a different way its not keeping you out its keeping him in.. If he has anger issues at least he has his wall to go behind until it times to face a little bit of his issue in MC, which means hes not throwing his toys at you which he used to do in the past when things didnt go his way. I wonder if validating his wall might get him to look at it.. you know Mr Rabbit and I used to joke about his wall and about how well it was built and did he needs some more mortar to put the brick back on I'd just knocked off.. over time he saw how much his wall was stopping him from enjoying things..
Just chucking thoughts about but what about saying I know your not ready for any R at home yet but it would be nice to go out and have coffee as friends, lets face it what ever happens in the long run we need to work on that! Were coming into spring nearly so think about things like after dinner taking S to the park on his park for half hour or playing ball in the garden with him, things you can instigate and H join in.. Or feed S get him to bed and make a special dinner for you and H.
You have come such a long way and although this is gonna be painful to hear both of you have been in this anger/pain/anger cycle for years, its gonna take a long time to turn it round but you can do it, great news he acknowledged your theatre night and it is a big positive baby step he is still going to MC.. chin up chicken some how we will get through this all together ((()))
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
