12 hours after H's parked car got hit, another car hit it. H. is staring out the window, looking at car and as I'm leaving for work, say "Hmm, looks like you'll be getting a free new car this winter". H. makes small talk about night before. If not for that exchange, wouldn't have spoken one word w/one another.
Wind up spending Friday night on my married BF's couch. H. doesn't ask where I was and I don't offer. Stay upstairs or locked in my office. Take very long nap, due to lack of sleep & BF's S5. I am fully aware of the conclusion that H. is probably coming to. H. is back to hanging out in the living room almost full time. He had been locked in his office for the last 5 months.
Saturday night, had a bit of a catastrophe at the bar that required hours of clean-up, and the place still looked like a disaster. Got home at 5:30 a.m., 1.5 - 2 hours later than usual, about the same time as if I went to the after-hours club. H. had major issues w/the 3 or 4 times a year I'd go to after-hours.
My BF works the early shift at the bar, so I called to explain why the mess. H. was in his office and able to hear the entire convo. I assume that he figured I came home late b/c I went to after-hours. He didn't ask, I didn't say anything.
H. spends afternoon in his office, w/door wide open. Usually, door is shut or just opened a crack so the cats can push it open to visit. Door is ALWAYS shut when texting/calling OW. I sat on couch watching 'Cheaters' marathon w/dog. H. comes down, sees what I'm watching, fusses over dog, goes back upstairs. Silently laugh to myself, as I'm sure 'Cheaters' wasn't exactly making him comfortable. Found it oddly telling / puzzling / befuddling that he was NC w/OW on VD for the hours we were both home together. Usually it's all day long on the weekends even though I'm home.
Later on, H. comes down to get ready for band practice. Dog is completely snuggled up against me, with her face in my face. H. kneels down, gets in dog's face and mine by default. Asks me to take her out b/4 I leave for work and to crate her. Tell him I do that every Sunday. The odd part is, every Sunday, H. just leaves and doesn't say a word. Every time H. leaves, he doesn't say a word. Just expects that I will take care of dog, which I do.
Last night, forgot to take my phone to bed w/me. Left it on my desk. Get up this morning, and notice that I have a new text and new VM. My phone has 2 screens that you have to touch to get rid of the notices or are able do anything else. So clearly, he touched my phone, I guess to see who called me or see who/what I'm texting. I've made it a point of deleting everything. Some days, phone will beep in front of H, I'll respond and erase on the spot. He sees me doing this. And again, I can imagine the conclusions that he may jump to.
I feel kind of bad that I'm encouraging him to think that I'm dating, but it does seem to be having an effect on him.
Maybe the reality of his decision is starting to fully dawn on him. There are packed boxes everywhere, and I haven't come home twice in 8 days. For all intensive purposes, it would be easy for him to conclude that there is OM.
Edit, extra info: I realize that encouraging him to think the worst is essentially playing games. I think he may be receptive to the OM idea due to his own A. There are things he says / does that betray his guilt over A. I don't think I'm hitting the guilt button, but definitely the jealousy button. Think it's a good thing for H. to realize that just b/c he doesn't want me doesn't mean nobody else will either.
Last edited by Ruined; 02/16/1008:55 AM.
M & H: 40 M: 5.5 T: 7.5 OW: 7/09 Bomb: 9/09 Sep: 3/10 H files 7/10
