rr22, I couldn't tell you. I moved to piecing when a) my H began MC with me, and b) the anger started dying down. Yes, this included some laughter and sharing some food. But all our time still is with S. There is no dating of any kind. There's no affection, talk of reconsiliation, or time spent just the two of us. One time I asked him to go out with me as an xmas present, he did. We also started watching tv together before bed when he is here, but presumably he is here just for S.
I can't tell you my sitch is like others, so please measure your own sitch according to your own gut feelings.
For me, I did a little theatre night tonight. I expected H to be upset, but when I called to say I was coming home, he asked how it went. That was a positive baby step. We also watched some tv and had some laughs before bed. Positive.
But I"m still upset over no VDay gift or card, no ILYs, or talk of the future. Still upset H won't spend time with me alone. I'm getting exhausted from the rejection.
But our MC went well today in that H said he was willing to work on his anger issues, and that he understands that I may like hearing that but still be afraid he won't calm himself in the moment. He admitted he gets more aggressive when confronting about his anger in the moment, and heard how hard this is for me. No resolutions, but he heard that this is a crucial issue for me that must be worked on if we are to reconsile.
So, good and bad, up and down. Hope is not lost, but love is not in the air, either.
