#2: WAH separated from us & I'm on the DBing path

[flowmom]

I posted this in sgctxok's thread (regarding interactions between H and I):

Overall: strained. On my part: pleasant, polite, cooperative, with the occasional gently but firmly taking a stand on a parenting issue. On his part: polite, but grim, seems to be dealing with a lot of fight-or-flight but keeping the lid on. I where I'm having trouble demonstrating change is that I feel like he's not being real with me, and seeing a different reaction than he's used to. Today was an exception. He was more tired than usual and started getting a bit into "attack" mode when we were talking about scheduling. He said "well we never were able to talk about this when we were together" kind of bitterly, but I was able to redirect the conversation back to the present and verbalize that we are both doing our best to make coparenting work and we just need to be clear about what our scheduling needs are...that did seem to defuse things.

She replied:

This is awesome...and a log for your solution journal. FOCUS ON THE EXCEPTIONS! You were successful!!!! GREAT DBing!

I'm copying it here because I'm having trouble recognizing my successes with DBing (and mostly it's the same old same old distant and polite interactions).