I hope this helps. It makes me wonder though..are you in the least bit attracted to her, even after 11 years? I know the marriage was arranged, but you've not been able to feel anything for her?
It does help - a lot!
I feel: - immense caring for the mother of my kids - warmth of touch, sexual and non-sexual from someone who says she loves me - sympathy for not wanting to cause hurt to her
Am I attracted? I am a 34yr old guy, so there is a point where anyone under the covers can feel good to some extent. Physically attracted otherwise? No. I never really got a good look at her before we married. I've suggested clothing and stuff that I find attractive, but her style isn't what works for me, either. I have to say, I really have a huge fear that since she's physically aging so fast because she won't take care of herself, that by the time she's 50 she'll be really unattractive to the point I can't be with her.
My BIL made a very good point. He said attraction comes when you feel love. I've also read that the mental/emotional/physical connection works to make attraction. In Jan we were trying to reconcile and I had the best physical days with her I have ever had. That simple point allowed me to move beyond the lack of attraction, but through the month in lessend.
It makes me wonder though..are you in the least bit attracted to her, even after 11 years? I know the marriage was arranged, but you've not been able to feel anything for her?