Sorry, ssm. I didn't find a thread that outlines your situation completely, but I recall that your wife did say she was done with sex years ago, right? Do you bring up that you are trying to change that status quo or do you pretend everything is honkey dorey?
Oh yes, very clear, to the point where she that I was being ridiculous. She said that what I had to say made her feel very bad about herself. The problem is, you can't "make" someone want sex, and she felt hopeless because she couldn't "make" herself want it either.
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My situation is a bit different. I am most definitely HD but I just want the orgasm and while lingerie, role play, toys, etc are certainly interesting, I could live just fine with missionary and doggy style every night.
Don't get me wrong, I could live with just those two things too, for years and years, as long as they were frequent!
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Ultimately it's about pushing our partners buttons the right way. Good luck with whatever you are trying to accomplish - for me, 1 year no overt sexual advances. It's only been 4 days since I made this commitment, and already my husband is wondering what the heck is going on. Since I have backed off (truly, not just half hearted in the past), he's been sniffing around.
It looks very positive for you because you get a reaction that's moving in the right direction. I've not pushed for any sex at all for years, and my wife is happy not to be bothered. As they say, it's usually the person with the lower sex drive that gets his/her way.
Heck, I even suggested to my wife that perhaps I should have a mistress just for the sex, while maintaining everything else as it is. She certainly got the point, but didn't do anything to improve our sex life. At least your husband is willing to try to move in the direction you want, or is at least giving some signs that he would.
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ps: this whole being coy thing is new to me... Why hasn't anyone bitten on the prior thread on this board? What was the reference not intriguing?
I didn't find a thread that outlines your situation completely, but I recall that your wife did say she was done with sex years ago, right? Do you bring up that you are trying to change that status quo or do you pretend everything is honkey dorey?