Divorcebusting.com  |  Contact      
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 1 of 17 1 2 3 16 17
#1938868 02/15/10 06:08 PM
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
K
K4D Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
K
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
So here is my new thread since I was graciously asked to start a new one.

The previous one is here...
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...671#Post1937671

So for an update. I delivered about 2 dozen tulips to my W's house and a single red rose and a card that said "Appreciating you on this day". It was signed by me and my girls. Tulips were red and pink and I arranged them on the corner of the kitchen table side by side with the single rose in from of both and the card in front of the rose.

I wasn't sure what kind of reaction it might bring. The roses from OM/counterfeit were in the center of the table so that is why I put mine on the corner of the table.

I didn't hear anything last night. This morning when I got the kids in the car to take them to school my W called. I thought that was odd at that hour so I answered. She said that she loved the tulips and the card and that tulips have always been her favorite flowers. She said thank you and wanted to call me last night to thank me but she didn't get home til midnight and thought it might be to late. I said you are welcomed and that I had remembered that tulips were always your favorite. She said between those and the other flowers she got she got a total of about 50. She apparently counted each one. She told me to tell the girls she loves them and I said I will and to have a good day and we got off the phone.

Not quite the reaction I had expected from her and especially a call first thing this morning.

Kevin


Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 3,325
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 3,325
50? Wow! Who else besides you and OM gave her flowers?

Glad she thought they were from the girls. I would have a hard time giving flowers if OM or OMen were also giving her flowers. Just doesn't seem right.


Me: 46 FWS: 36
Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07
Baby Girl born 3/08
Kicked him out because OW: 7/08
5/10 He realized what he had and lost.
Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,866
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,866
I think you missed the caution light and walked right in....

back up!

Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
K
K4D Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
K
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
Quote:
50? Wow! Who else besides you and OM gave her flowers?


I'm not sure if she got any others. Mine and his may have added up to 50. But I don't know.

Quote:
I think you missed the caution light and walked right in....


SM, you are going to have to do a little bit better at filling me in here with this statement.

Kevin


Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
K
K4D Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
K
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
SM,

If you meant because OM/counterfeit's roses were on the table, I might have treaded there without caution. But it obviously touched W enough to want to call and thank me for them. She didn't lash out at me. She seemed genuinely grateful and happy when we spoke.

Kevin


Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,320
Likes: 10
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,320
Likes: 10
Originally Posted By: K4D
Not quite the reaction I had expected from her and especially a call first thing this morning.

Standard DB advice: No expectations.


Everybody hurts. It's part of life. Don't miss the good stuff.
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,866
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,866
Originally Posted By: Steve McQueen
I think you missed the caution light and walked right in....

back up!


Originally Posted By: Drew
Originally Posted By: K4D
Not quite the reaction I had expected from her and especially a call first thing this morning.

Standard DB advice: No expectations.

ah rha cha cha

Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,612
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,612
I am glad you got a job. I am sure the relief is a very good feeling to have!

It seems to me you have reached a point where you will be content keeping things how they are with your W as long as no divorce is filed. If you are able to erase any and all expectations and avoid going in the slump you stayed in for a very long time then do what is best for you.

Like ALL of us need to keep doing, my hope for you is you are able to work on some of your personal issues either way. DB is not for everybody.

Good luck at your new job! Take care!

Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
K
K4D Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
K
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 3,975
Quote:
Standard DB advice: No expectations.


My expectations were that she would probably be angry about them. So it was a surprise that she loved them.

Quote:
I am glad you got a job. I am sure the relief is a very good feeling to have!

It seems to me you have reached a point where you will be content keeping things how they are with your W as long as no divorce is filed. If you are able to erase any and all expectations and avoid going in the slump you stayed in for a very long time then do what is best for you.

Like ALL of us need to keep doing, my hope for you is you are able to work on some of your personal issues either way. DB is not for everybody.

Good luck at your new job! Take care!


Thanks CG. I appreciate it.

Kevin


Me 36, W 37
M: 08/02/97
D13, D9
1st Bomb 02/08
Reconciled 04/08
2nd Bomb: 09/08
W filed for D 02/04/09
Separated 03/09
D dismissed 06/09/09
Still separated...
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 4,058
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 4,058
Originally Posted By: K4D
Quote:
Standard DB advice: No expectations.


My expectations were that she would probably be angry about them. So it was a surprise that she loved them.


like the advice says -- strive for none at all, zero, nada.


debut thread
Page 1 of 17 1 2 3 16 17

Moderated by  Cadet, DnJ, job, Michele Weiner-Davis 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Michele Weiner-Davis Training Corp. 1996-2025. All rights reserved.
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5