Ring On or Ring Off????

[Upside]

I'm trying to appreciate his pain, but it is so hard at times when he appears to be so totally happy and pleased with himself and what he's doing..............

He appears happy and pleased with himself because he has to convince himself and everyone else that he made the right choice. If he acted unhappy and miserable like he really feels (but is denying to himself) everyone would know that he is screwed up and that the choices he is making are unjustifiable.

I know it is difficult to understand sometimes. I still have difficulty completely understanding my H's depression even though he now admits to it. Have you read much about male depression? Men are more likely to deny that they are depressed and mask their depression with OW, alcohol, drugs, work, etc. Some men see depression as a sign of weakness and therefore deny it and do not seek help for it. Your H may not have any clue yet that he is suffering from depression.

So, today I learned of a local woman that I know whose husband took off---just left----a WAS. I feel horrible that I'm thinking how much better that would be for me.

I know exactly how you feel. Have you seen the movie It's Complicated? There is a scene where Meryl Streep is talking with her girlfriends and she comments to one how lucky she is because her husband died. It was very funny and I can so relate!