I know how everyone feels. My WAH's B-Day is tomorrow and V-Day right behind, does not make for a pleasurable weekend. The one thing that really helped calm and relax me this week was a long hot bath.
My father is actually coming in town tomorrow to "lift my spirits". But for anyone out there who justs wants to relax, I tell you, a hot bath does wonders in helping to relax (and it is also a great way to pamper yourself, especially when our WAS's are still "tripping")
Have a great night!
OLD THREAD-http://tinyurl.com/y98nuty Me 44 H 51 T 15 yrs M 9+ yrs No Kids "You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless you trust enough."
NO CARD. It's not worth the risk of seeming pursuing, and for a let down if he doesn't reciprocate. If it never was that big of a deal anyhow, let it go. Treat it like just another day. I believe the LBSs need to not do anything on VDay. My gosh, we were left, and the WASs are the ones on the fence. They know where we stand a card is just pressure.
If our spouses do something, it's a bonus, but prepare for nothing so you're not disapointed. JMTC
However, I do advocate doing something loving for yourself. Be your own valentine. Give yourself flowers and chocolate.
Yes, the tiredness and always being ill is very common to MLC. My H has had many things "wrong" with him in the past year or so. He gets sick a lot more than normal. Some are real and some I think imagined. And my H also went from barely sleeping at all for a few months to not being able to stay awake when he is home.
That fatigue I believe can also be caused by the depression aspect.
London broil and crab cakes - yum! Enjoy the day with your girls.
You will see this. They will sleep, sometimes for days. My son’s father, some days he is as high as a kite, up and doing things, then others, he does not come out of his room. If you knock, he is asleep. This is something that has gone on for years, I never can predict which person is going to show up, so I just go with it.
Please, whatever you do, do NOT let this affect you. If you are not careful, it is easy to get stuck into their routine, doing things when they are up and doing things, and becoming a couch potato when they aren’t.
Remember where the focus needs to be and keep it there.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
cat has provided you with some very wise words about getting stuck into their routine. You do not want to be drawn down into the dark pit with them. It's so easy to fall into that pit with them because of the mood swings. Step back, allow them to wallow in that pit by themselves.
She's also correct in stating that they sleep a lot and then other times are higher than a kite. It's all part of the depression. The depression self medication can be in the form of drugs, booze, women, gambling, internet, porn, sports, eating, sitting and staring into space (or as I say, zoning out), anger, etc. That is why it is very, very important to keep the focus on you and your children. There is nothing you can do for them.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
so im having a good sob...ya know WE are the normal ones...im ok, gonna start cooking soon but the more i tried to hold my feelings in the worse it was...
i miss my best friend, my lover, my partner...
he called , even said happy valentines day...so i guess i should be pleased that i got that...which i am surprised.
its the lonliness i guess...
me 39 h 38 kids 9 and 6 h left 8/9/09 loving and devoted wife and mother still going...10 months later...
It will get better in time. You are never alone, i.e., your children are there w/you, family, friends, board members and the man upstairs is always w/you. I know what you are saying, but really, it's not very good company right now.
It's okay to cry, but do it away from your children. They do not need to see you upset.
Hang in there.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
