Sigh. Today was the day from hell...apparently because my ex just glossed over that text message I sent her the other day that she responded "FINALLY!" to and only saw it as me saying I was fine with everything and wasnt interested in her anymore.
She apparently missed the part of that text the other day about making an effort but having no regrets even if it didnt work out.
She ended up telling me today that if I ruined things with her and the OM she would murder me.
She said that the OM thinks I'm crazy, and I can only assume that's based on my going over there and catching them two weeks ago as well as anything my ex might be feeding him. I told her that I didnt know I would find them together over there...that when a person who doesnt normally go to bed until 2AM says they're going to bed at 10PM and their Blackberry goes offline (which she also never does)...something weird was going on and I wanted to make sure she and D3 werent home invasion victims.
While I dont want any legal action taken against me, nor do I want to be murdered by my ex, I would be happy if her and OM did part ways.
I dont know why or how she thinks I could ruin things for her...I mean at 41 he knows he's got a good thing by having a 26 year old to have sex with and parade around town...and from the way my ex is talking, she's seeing dollar signs and a higher quality of life. So I dont see my being able to do a thing to come between them. Maybe he doesnt like drama...yet he doesnt see or care that he's an obstacle to a family reuniting.
My ex sent me text messages and called me, and I responded to the messages and calls, and then she said I was harassing her. I asked her what she wanted me to do...not respond or answer when she asks me something. All that does is piss her off and make her text and call more.
She gave me the "we're done" speech again and said she only wanted to talk about D3. I think there was blame and discussion of not trying, and she said she was "trying" that week but that I went and spied on her with the OM and messed it all up.
She said again how it made no sense that I thought she cheated on me with OM and called her a name (that I didnt) and still wanted to be back with her. She said she's so stressed out that she cant eat anymore without getting sick.
She said she was gonna take me for everything (which makes no sense since we're not M) and that I lost her and if I kept it up I would lose D3 too.
Again what all this has done to me doesnt matter. It doesnt matter that I've gotten less than 4 hours of sleep per night since she left (despite two different and strong prescriptions), or that I wake up with dry heaves every morning, or that I've had constant heart palpitations 24/7 since she left...and thats just the physical stress.
At some point she started screaming into the phone cursing and and saying how she hated me and then hung up.
Then she called back and asked why I keep doing this to her. I told her it didnt have to be like this...and that things werent like this...that I wasnt like I am before she left. That made her bring up discussion of her being so miserable living at home and all the things I did/didnt do that gave her grief.
I told her once again that I had no idea how unhappy she was and she accused me of not living in reality but instead living on another planet or in a bubble. She said the same thing when I told her I didnt realize we were "trying" that week when we did all that stuff. She siad she couldnt understand why I have to be told everything.
She then said if I wanna talk and hang out, go to lunch, etc and that will make me feel better then thats fine. I think she might have rescended the offer again...who knows. She still ended up hanging up on me because she had to go to work.
She thinks I'm crazy...I think that's the pot calling the kettle black. Times like this I wish I could go live on another planet.